Better day
First of all let me say I am SO thankful for everyone of you who have commented or called. You have no idea how much it has meant to me to have the encouragement I have received from all of you. I have been so blessed by hearing everyones stories and I feel like I am not going through this alone. Thank you.
Today was a better day. I am constantly struggling with my own issues about not wanting to give Haven formula, but as of yesterday Adam and I have adopted a new philosophy even if it is temporary. Our new goal is just to fatten this child up as quickly as possible. So I am feeding her and pumping the opposite side and only letting her feed for 20 min so she doesn't exhaust herself. Then we are either following with the milk I just pumped or formula. I am trying to make SURE she is totally full after each feeding no matter what the content. I am also taking an herbal supplement (fenugreek) that is supposed to increase milk supply (we'll see if that works). I am going to try it for a week or two to see. Hopefully I can manage this system until I can get more out of pumping and a fatter more satisfied baby girl. My goal is to eventually be back to only breastfeeding, but of course I am going to do what is best for her because when it comes down to it, it doesn't matter as long as she is thriving. All of that said, I still enjoy hearing what worked for all of you. I am open for anything that might work and willing to try anything.
Anyway, so today was better. I got up at 5:30 to feed Haven and at 6:45 when she still was not back to sleep and started in with the hiccups Adam came in to her room to take over so I could go back to sleep. I was SO tired, I don't know what I would do if I did not have such a wonderful and helpful husband. Man, do I have a new appreciation for single mothers! How do they do it?!
So today my mom came up here at about 2:30 to watch Haven while I went to a construction site of a job I have been working on since May. They kinda frown upon taking infants on construction sites so unfortunately I had to go without her. I did miss her the entire time I was gone, but it was really good for me to be out of the house for a couple of hours. Although a un-air conditioned building is NOT really the place I'd like to spend my free time, but I really didn't have much of a choice. Selfishly I am thankful Haven came when she did because of this project since the install of this job is on the 18th of this month. Had she come THIS week, I would just be barely used to this mothering thing by the time I had to leave her for a day or two and be totally otherwise occupied. Although the client knew when they hired me for the job that I would be delivering a baby and really busy around the time of the install, they still decided they wanted me for the job (crazy people). Its been a huge blessing for us and possibly the most fun project I have ever worked on, but I am quite confident that the stress of this job and all the work leading up to it is most likely what caused me to go into early labor. Either way, that is all in the past. So today I had to run over to the site and look at the stained concrete floors that have just been finished in order to pick a rug for one of the spaces. I also was meeting with a drapery work room and talk about what needed to be done in the way of window coverings for 4 different units. I was so excited to see this place sheet rocked, painted and all the cabinetry and floors installed. Its all coming together. Coming into this job was very difficult because I had to come up with furniture, art, accessories, rugs, etc. etc. for an entire model apartment unit, marketing center, two offices and a resident lounge....all without even seeing this place sheet rocked. Let me say its hard to pick art for walls you have never seen and accessories to go on pieces you don't know the scale of. Not only that but the development company I was doing all of this for is based out of Nashville so I didn't actually get to meet these people until they flew here to see the presentation of all of these spaces I had designed for them based upon a conversation I had with their VP of marketing back in May. CRAZY way to do a project, but after MANY MANY prayers it all came together and they loved it. So if you would like to see the progression of this project, be my guest. I am sure I will be posting pictures of it once its all installed and photographed. Should be totally finished the first week of October. Here is the link to Arthouse in Keller If you click on "About Us" you can look at up to date progress photos, pretty neat place....I started thinking I might like to live there myself after being there today. What a fun job this has been for me to design.
Well, that is about all for today. Adam is trying desperately to get Haven to go to sleep, she won't let him sit down without crying. I think she just feels like she will miss out on something if she is sleeping once her daddy is home. Silly girl. Is there a point when you should stop spoiling them? We are so determined not to get her into "bad habits" of having to be rocked to sleep, walked to sleep (I can see that is REALLY working right now) but she just cries and cries if we put her in her crib before she it totally passed out. Makes for some long nights but it just kills me to let her cry this young. When can you just let them cry it out? Its a heart breaker!
Hope you all have a good weekend. I am going to finish my wine and go to bed...maybe
Today was a better day. I am constantly struggling with my own issues about not wanting to give Haven formula, but as of yesterday Adam and I have adopted a new philosophy even if it is temporary. Our new goal is just to fatten this child up as quickly as possible. So I am feeding her and pumping the opposite side and only letting her feed for 20 min so she doesn't exhaust herself. Then we are either following with the milk I just pumped or formula. I am trying to make SURE she is totally full after each feeding no matter what the content. I am also taking an herbal supplement (fenugreek) that is supposed to increase milk supply (we'll see if that works). I am going to try it for a week or two to see. Hopefully I can manage this system until I can get more out of pumping and a fatter more satisfied baby girl. My goal is to eventually be back to only breastfeeding, but of course I am going to do what is best for her because when it comes down to it, it doesn't matter as long as she is thriving. All of that said, I still enjoy hearing what worked for all of you. I am open for anything that might work and willing to try anything.
Anyway, so today was better. I got up at 5:30 to feed Haven and at 6:45 when she still was not back to sleep and started in with the hiccups Adam came in to her room to take over so I could go back to sleep. I was SO tired, I don't know what I would do if I did not have such a wonderful and helpful husband. Man, do I have a new appreciation for single mothers! How do they do it?!
So today my mom came up here at about 2:30 to watch Haven while I went to a construction site of a job I have been working on since May. They kinda frown upon taking infants on construction sites so unfortunately I had to go without her. I did miss her the entire time I was gone, but it was really good for me to be out of the house for a couple of hours. Although a un-air conditioned building is NOT really the place I'd like to spend my free time, but I really didn't have much of a choice. Selfishly I am thankful Haven came when she did because of this project since the install of this job is on the 18th of this month. Had she come THIS week, I would just be barely used to this mothering thing by the time I had to leave her for a day or two and be totally otherwise occupied. Although the client knew when they hired me for the job that I would be delivering a baby and really busy around the time of the install, they still decided they wanted me for the job (crazy people). Its been a huge blessing for us and possibly the most fun project I have ever worked on, but I am quite confident that the stress of this job and all the work leading up to it is most likely what caused me to go into early labor. Either way, that is all in the past. So today I had to run over to the site and look at the stained concrete floors that have just been finished in order to pick a rug for one of the spaces. I also was meeting with a drapery work room and talk about what needed to be done in the way of window coverings for 4 different units. I was so excited to see this place sheet rocked, painted and all the cabinetry and floors installed. Its all coming together. Coming into this job was very difficult because I had to come up with furniture, art, accessories, rugs, etc. etc. for an entire model apartment unit, marketing center, two offices and a resident lounge....all without even seeing this place sheet rocked. Let me say its hard to pick art for walls you have never seen and accessories to go on pieces you don't know the scale of. Not only that but the development company I was doing all of this for is based out of Nashville so I didn't actually get to meet these people until they flew here to see the presentation of all of these spaces I had designed for them based upon a conversation I had with their VP of marketing back in May. CRAZY way to do a project, but after MANY MANY prayers it all came together and they loved it. So if you would like to see the progression of this project, be my guest. I am sure I will be posting pictures of it once its all installed and photographed. Should be totally finished the first week of October. Here is the link to Arthouse in Keller If you click on "About Us" you can look at up to date progress photos, pretty neat place....I started thinking I might like to live there myself after being there today. What a fun job this has been for me to design.
Well, that is about all for today. Adam is trying desperately to get Haven to go to sleep, she won't let him sit down without crying. I think she just feels like she will miss out on something if she is sleeping once her daddy is home. Silly girl. Is there a point when you should stop spoiling them? We are so determined not to get her into "bad habits" of having to be rocked to sleep, walked to sleep (I can see that is REALLY working right now) but she just cries and cries if we put her in her crib before she it totally passed out. Makes for some long nights but it just kills me to let her cry this young. When can you just let them cry it out? Its a heart breaker!
Hope you all have a good weekend. I am going to finish my wine and go to bed...maybe
Comments
This one is about crying it out:
http://www.askdrsears.com/html/5/T051200.asp#T051205
This one is about spoinling babies:
http://www.askdrsears.com/html/10/t100200.asp
God bless you and Haven - still praying for you both!
Hold her, rock her and let her fall asleep in your arms. You can work on a good bedtime routine when she is a little older and is sleeping more regularly.
don't worry at ALL about "spoiling" your baby. that is something people say with good intentions but it is impossible for an infant to have the ability to manipulate a situation, know that if they do something they will get "their way" and be spoiled. they only know what is comfortable and the first few weeks are a challenge to get in sync with that. i promise, you are NOT alone with this! i did the same thing, but i thought i was doing something wrong. i agree with wezie completely. hold that baby, rock her, let her fall asleep in your arms and don't worry or listen to the "spoiling talk". i have three sweet children myself. the first two were poor nursers and my second was born early and too tiny as well. what you described, the jaw quivering, everything, was exactly what we experienced. she was borderline failure to thrive for what seemed like FOREVER. worrying only makes it more difficult for your milk to come in, is what i was told... guess what? i worried more! can't help it! when you are a new mommy, even for the second time, that's what you do. i worried so much that i got my lactation consultant's certification! so, nurse and pump as you have been told to do, rest yourself in between. she is not starving. she will be fine. i promise with my whole heart, it all works out. you absolutely do NOT have to give formula if you don't want to. you absolutely CAN give formula if you choose to. it's been done for years and years without formula and with. it all works out. it's just hard when you are sleep deprived. :o)
i hope this helps, may God bless your sweet little family and precious infant.